Why are these phases so delicate and how to deal with them? Decryption with Johanna Rozenblum, clinical psychologist on these 3 moments when your relationship is in danger.
When the honeymoon phase fades: back to reality
There honeymoon phase of a couple, often idyllic, can last between 6 months and a year. During this period, everything seems perfect, as if the world revolves around shared love. However, a 2022 study shows that this period is fading with the arrival of everyday constraints:
work, family, and divergent goals.
“When reality sets in, some couples realize that they do not share the same priorities or do not have the same ways of managing stress”explains Johanna Rozenblum.
This is often when the first big discussions – or breakups – occur.
The holidays: an unexpected trap for the couple
Vacations, supposed to be a bubble of relaxation, can paradoxically turn into fertile ground for conflicts. For what ? Because the stress linked to the organization, family reunions, or even financial problems weighs heavily. The end-of-year holidays are particularly dreadful: accumulation of fatigue, latent tensions, and unrealistic expectations sometimes bring everything to a head.
“Holidays often amplify existing frustrations. They then become a time when disagreements explode”adds the psychologist.
Also read: As the start of the school year approaches, women are twice as stressed as men
The major stages of life: a test for the strength of the couple
Some stages of life are more critical than others for a couple. According to Johanna Rozenblum, these key moments often coincide with important decisions:
- At 3 years oldpartners realize that they have difficulty managing their disagreements.
- At 7 years oldquestions of evolution or stagnation emerge.
- After 10 to 12 yearsthe couple must prove that they can move beyond routine or choose to separate.
- Beyond 15 yearsthe risk is to live as simple roommates, forgetting the importance of friendship in the relationship.
The two key factors that precipitate breakup
More than dates, it’s the assembly of two factors which pushes to the breaking point:
- A stressful situation generating anxiety, anger or frustration.
- A inability to regulate moodoften due to fatigue or a feeling of incomprehension.
These elements combined create fertile ground for explosive conflicts.
“Rather than fearing these moments, we must strive to maintain healthy communication and not let tensions build up.”advises Johanna Rozenblum.
Keys to strengthening your relationship
If you are going through one of these sensitive periods, a few simple solutions can make a difference:
- Communicate actively : verbalize your frustrations before they take hold.
- Take a step back : identify the sources of stress and try to limit them.
- Rekindle the flame : devote time to nurturing friendship and complicity within the couple.