“I’m tired.” You may find yourself repeating this phrase almost mechanically. Or you hear it constantly from your partner, your colleagues, your loved ones. In a time where everything seems to move too quickly – work, children, procedures, notifications, obligations – this seems almost normal. However, this fatigue that we talk about so often does not always reflect a simple lack of sleep.
Don’t put it behind lack of sleep
Behind these very banal words can sometimes hide a much deeper exhaustion. Because some fatigue cannot be resolved with an eight-hour night.
For Amélie Boukhobza, it is essential to learn to hear this sentence differently. “It’s a phrase we hear everywhere. All the time. At work, in consultation, with friends, in couples”explains the clinical psychologist. And if we spontaneously think of too busy days or a lack of sleep, this is not always what is at stake.
A mental fatigue that never really goes away
Some people sleep, but never really recover. For what ? Because their mind never pauses.
“Mental, nervous, emotional fatigue really exists”recalls Amélie Boukhobza. In some people who are anxious or hypervigilant, the brain continues to analyze, anticipate and think constantly, even when they are resting.
“Because their brain never completely shuts down. And over time, this hypervigilance is exhausting.”
This permanent inner tension ends up consuming a lot of energy. Some people live as if they are in a continuous “state of alert”: they think about everything, control everything, anticipate problems before they even happen. In the long term, this invisible effort becomes exhausting.
The fatigue of those who have been “holding on” for too long
There is also another fatigue, even quieter: that of people who contain their emotions enormously. Those who ensure daily life. Who cash in. Who take it upon themselves without ever really releasing the pressure.
This psychological wear and tear can end up making the simplest tasks incredibly difficult.. “Replying to a message, making a decision, going out to see friends, playing sports or simply starting your day can then require an immense effort.”
And the problem is that many people feel guilty about feeling this fatigue. Because they feel like they “have no real reason” to be exhausted. So they minimize what they are experiencing. They do not explain inner stress, incessant thoughts or emotional burden. They simply say: “I’m tired” Without necessarily being heard.
When fatigue becomes a psychological signal
Behind this very common complaint can in reality hide many psychological sufferings:
- Chronic mental overload;
- Diffuse anxiety;
- Old stress that never really goes away;
- Emotional exhaustion;
- A depression that sets in gradually;
- Or sometimes a burnout that approaches quietly.
The body and brain then remain stuck in a state of almost permanent alert. Even moments that are supposed to be restful are no longer enough to fully recover. This is why Amélie Boukhobza insists on the importance of listening differently to this seemingly banal sentence.
“We need to understand this complaint differently. And not just as a problem with organization or sleep.”
A fatigue that should not be trivialized
Of course, persistent fatigue can also have physical or medical causes: deficiencies, sleep disorders, hormonal problems, infections, chronic pain, etc. If it lasts, medical advice remains important.
But psychologically too, this feeling deserves to be taken seriously. Because by operating “on autopilot”, some people end up no longer realizing how exhausted they are internally.
Sometimes saying “I’m tired” is a more acceptable way of saying:
“I can’t take it anymore.”
A message that those around you should never trivialize.