Speaking in a meeting, setting a limit for a loved one, launching a new project: many feel blocked by a lack of self-confidence which gives the impression of being “like that” forever. However, psychological work says the opposite. A large American study, carried out on adults connected to social networks, shows that this feeling depends above all on our mental and relational habits, in particular on the way in which we compare ourselves to others.
Asked about these results, clinical psychotherapist and author Amy Morin explains that strengthening one’s self-confidence mainly comes down to establishing small, realistic routines, repeated on a daily basis. Clinical social worker Hannah Owens, who also works on this subject, emphasizes the importance of combining work on thoughts, care of the body and choice of those around you. Seven simple tips emerge from this research, accessible without disrupting your schedule.
Why self-confidence can be worked on as a skill
Self-confidence is not reduced to courage or charisma. Psychologists describe it as a skill built on several axes, such as self-esteem, a feeling of personal effectiveness and relational confidence. When we act on these levels, change becomes visible. The seven habits proposed by Amy Morin and Hannah Owens target precisely these levers: they help to calm down our outlook on ourselves, to dare a little more and to rely on supportive relationships.
7 concrete habits to strengthen your self-confidence
- First reflex to transform: constant social comparison, especially when scrolling through networks. The American study shows that the more envy increases, the more self-esteem falls.
- Hannah Owens recalls that “remembering that everyone shows what they want on the networks helps to put things into perspective“. A simple exercise is to limit screen time on an app and write down three small successes from the day each evening.
- Another major lever, choose loved ones who encourage rather than mocking people, then take care of your body through sleep, diet and movement.
- Fourth gesture, adopt self-compassion: after a failure, talking to yourself like a friend avoids sinking.
- Then changing your inner narrative reinforces this movement, transforming “I am not capable” into “I can learn”.
- Facing your fears in stages also advances the “muscle” of confidence, for example by asking a question in a meeting before aiming for a presentation.
- Owens summarizes the overall approach: “Treating yourself with respect sends a powerful signal“Highlighting your strengths finally consolidates this signal, by setting aside time each week for what you do well.
When these tips are not enough to regain self-confidence
These seven tips remain voluntary and progressive, they do not replace medical monitoring. When lack of self-confidence is accompanied by isolation, dark thoughts or difficulty functioning at work, it becomes useful to ask for help.
The World Health Organization points out that psychological well-being is part of health. Speaking to a GP or psychologist can then provide a safe framework for implementing these habits.