Sharing the marital bed has long remained a strong symbol of romantic union. However, more and more couples are deciding to have separate bedrooms, for reasons as varied as the need for comfort, incompatible lifestyles or sleep problems. But is this practice a harbinger of separation or a real secret to longevity for the couple?
Sleeping separately: a practical choice above all
Sleeping apart doesn’t necessarily mean a couple is going through a crisis. Many practical factors can justify this decision:
- Differences in pace: a night owl and an early riser may struggle to find balance;
- Nocturnal nuisances:
snoring, restless movements or insomnia can disrupt the partner’s sleep; - Personal comfort: some prefer firm bedding, others soft; a simple sheet may be enough for one while the other needs several blankets.
Moreover, some studies show that sharing a bed could cause you to lose up to an hour of sleep per night, increasing irritability and tension within the couple.
A decision that must be accepted by both sides
If living in a separate room can improve the quality of life, it only works if both partners agree with this decision. When one experiences separation from the marital bed, it can lead to frustration and incomprehension.
“I always say that it is important for the couple to sleep together, but we can also hear that for reasons of good sleep, we may want to have a separate bedroom.recalls Amélie Boukhobza.
According to her, what matters above all is preserving moments of connection.
Finding yourself differently: the key to success
Rooming apart does not mean breaking the bond. The main thing is to compensate for this nocturnal separation with quality time together:
- Take a moment together before going to sleep;
- Share common activities in the evening;
- Finding yourself waking up for a complicit moment.
As Amélie Boukhobza points out: “The most important thing is to spend quality time together. Sleeping together is just two inert bodies next to each other. But spending some time together before one or the other goes to bed; sharing time, an activity, or simply seeing each other and meeting up in the morning can be enough to bond the couple together.”.
Ultimately, there is no universal rule: each couple must find their own harmony to reconcile love and personal well-being.