More and more couples are choosing to sleep separately, an upheaval in the traditional codes of the marital bed. Whether for reasons of comfort, offbeat rhythms or sleep disorders, this practice raises a recurring question: is it the sign of a couple in crisis or on the contrary a solution to preserve harmony?
Sleep separately, a practical solution above all
Spending your nights in different rooms does not necessarily translate a disagreement. The reasons are often very concrete: a head-up partner in front of a time up, disturbing snoring, insomnia, or simply opposite preferences in terms of bedding. Some like a firm mattress, other softness, or a light sheet against a stack of blankets. According to several studies, sharing a bed would lose up to an hour of sleep per night, causing fatigue, irritability and unnecessary tensions.
A decision that must be shared
Choosing to make a separate room only works if the two partners are in agreement. When only one suffers this separation, frustration and misunderstanding settle quickly. Psychologist Amélie Boukhobza insists: “I always used to say that it is important to sleep together for the couple, but we can also hear that for questions of good sleep, we can want to make a separate room“. For her, the essential is not so much the bed shared as the way of preserving the moments of intimacy and complicity.
The secret, to be otherwise
Sleeping separately does not prevent cultivating the love link. You just have to invent other moments of rapprochement: share an activity in the evening, take a while before going to bed, or even getting wake up. As Amélie Boukhobza reminds us: “The most important thing is to spend quality time together. Sleeping together is never two inert bodies next to each other. But spend a moment together before one or the other goes to bed; Sharing a time, an activity, or simply seeing yourself and being in the morning may be enough to make the couple binder“. Finally, there is no unique model: each couple builds their own way of combining love and personal well-being.