“When I’m stressed, I eat”. If this sentence speaks to you, you are probably the type to “eat your emotions”. And this relationship can, in some people, result in particular weight gain, which specialists call emotional pounds. Here’s what you need to know to target and eliminate them.
Weight gain different from others
These kilos are distinct from purely physiological weight gains. As explained by Doctor Stéphane Clerget, psychiatrist and author of the book Emotional pounds: how to get rid of themit is a concept that he himself defined:
“It’s a term that I created to define weight gain which is not the consequence of a physiological problem or, in any case, when it is, it is originally linked to emotional factors.”
Emotions can act in several ways: pushing you to eat more than necessary, what we call hyperphagia, encouraging you to eat differently, often sweeter or fatter, or even promoting the storage of fat.
More surprisingly, some people can even gain weight without increasing their calorie intake.
“There are people who will not increase their calorie intake but who will nevertheless gain weight”underlines the psychiatrist.
The role of the brain and hormones
These phenomena are largely explained by the action of the brain. “Emotions, which are products of our brain, will influence mood neurotransmitters, which themselves will act on appetite hormones,” explains Dr. Clerget.
Some hormones stimulate appetite, like ghrelin, while others curb it, like obestatin. But “we don’t know them all”, he specifies, recalling that the mechanisms of emotional pounds still remain partially elucidated by science.
Eat to soothe, eat to celebrate
The emotions involved are not only negative. Anger, boredom, anxiety or dark thoughts can trigger uncontrolled eating. “Every time we want to avoid thinking, we eat. It’s like a cow that chews its cud. Anything that encourages mental ruminations can encourage food ruminations, to avoid them”explains the psychiatrist.
But joy, pride or relief can also lead to eating. In this case, it is often an old learning experience: “We have become accustomed to love coming through food. So, every time we feel good, we go and eat.”
“Soft foods”, a return to childhood
During these episodes, certain foods are more attractive than others. These are the famous cuddly foods. “These are the foods that take us back to childhood, when we need to regress, that is to say, to return to the time when we felt protected and consoled by our parents”explains Dr. Clerget. They are not necessarily fatty or sweet: “It can be milk,” he specifies.
Nutritionist Jean-Michel Cohen also recalls in a video that this link between food and appeasement is built very early:
“The relationship with food and affection is established from birth. The baby makes this incredible association between milk, the notion of pleasure and the notion of appeasement. We will therefore use food as a system of self-satisfaction.”
Women more concerned
Are we all equal when it comes to emotional weight? Not really. “What I have observed is that women are more affected than men.“, notes Dr. Clerget. He mentions educational, societal, and perhaps hormonal reasons: women have a greater tendency to take it upon themselves, to hold back emotionally, which would encourage somatization… and therefore the emotional weight gain.
These weight gains frequently occur during pivotal periods: puberty, bereavement, marriage, pregnancy, menopause. So many emotionally charged events.
“We always believe that weight gain during pregnancy is physiological. But no! Normally, we gain a few kilos and lose them. When this is not the case, it is often linked to the emotional impact”explains the psychiatrist, making the same observation for menopause.
Emotional hunger: a common and poorly understood phenomenon
“Eating when you are not hungry is much more common than you think”confirms Orlane Fagnoni, dietician-nutritionist. Stress, fatigue, mental load, boredom or intense emotions: for many, eating becomes a reflex that goes beyond physiological hunger.
She distinguishes two types of hunger. Physiological hunger appears gradually, with clear signals like a pit in the stomach or a drop in energy. Emotional hunger arises suddenly and focuses on a specific food. This can be a very clear sign.
“When you really want a particular food, it’s rarely a real hunger. It’s an emotional craving.”
Why diets make compulsions worse
Eating at these times acts as an emergency response. The brain seeks rapid relief. Sugar and fat are particularly effective in the short term, but the relief is fleeting and often gives way to guilt.
Orlane Fagnoni emphasizes a key point that we know little about: diets and dietary restrictions aggravate emotional hunger.
The multiplication of prohibitions creates permanent psychological tension. Neurobiologically, the brain perceives restriction as a threat. Result: reward circuits become hypersensitive and eating becomes obsessive.
“The more we restrict ourselves, the more the impulse ends up imposing itself”she summarizes.
Free yourself from emotional weight for the long term
Are emotional pounds harder to lose?
“Yes, but once you lose them, it’s permanent, it’s not like with diets”says Dr. Clerget. As long as you identify the causes and work on them.
On the food side, it is above all a question of not restricting oneself, but of finding a secure environment: “The only constraint is not to eat between meals and to eat three balanced meals a day.”
On a psychological level, support can be useful.
“Every time you feel hungry between meals, you have to ask yourself: what am I feeling? What am I thinking?”advises the psychiatrist.
Orlane Fagnoni discusses the interest of hypno-nutrition, an approach which combines nutrition and hypnosis to act on the unconscious automatisms linking emotions and food. And which offers good results.
“We do not remove the intention to calm down, we change the means used to achieve it”she summarizes. By multiplying non-food sources of pleasure and learning to recognize your emotions, impulses gradually lose intensity.
Without magical promises, this approach is consistent with current knowledge in neuroscience: our eating behaviors are largely governed by the unconscious, and it is by working at their roots that lasting appeasement becomes possible.