The departure of children is not always synonymous with newfound freedom for couples. Some even suffer from this new tranquility, like Marine Delterme, the heroine of the detective series “Alice Nevers, the judge is a woman”. In an interview with Gala, the actress spoke in complete transparency about this slump, for her and her couple.
Empty nest syndromecan be a crisis phase for couples”
The departure of the children marks an important turning point in the lives of the parents: while they were punctuated by the school schedule and the judo-piano-swimming activities on Tuesday evening, here they are… free of all constraints.
A new freedom, which is not necessarily a guarantee of romantic fulfillment: we no longer know how to occupy all this free time. Should you garden, take up chess or even go out to dinner every evening with your husband (even though you no longer know how to do it)?
If no miracle recipe exists, Marine Delterme knows this feeling only too well, she who spoke openly about this “empty nest syndrome”, from which she suffered when her children left.
“I knew him with my eldest son, I will meet him again in a few months with the youngest who is going to study.”deplores the actress in the columns of Gala magazine, before specifying: “We often talk about it with my husband. You have to anticipate it because it can be a crisis phase for couples. Children create external challenges and, suddenly, we have to redefine roles, reinvent a life together.”
A challenge, which the actress nevertheless wishes to take up, she who says she is deeply in love with her husband, Florian Zeller, successful filmmaker and playwright. “He’s an extraordinary enough man that I want to fight to keep him, that I want to take steps and build things with him.”she assures.
A freedom that can be “confusing”
If the departure of children is not only a moment of transition for oneself and one’s partner – it is also a way of reinvesting in one’s daily life – Pascal Anger, psychologist, recognizes that this episode can be a source of difficulties.
“This new freedom – without children – can be disconcerting and embarrassing: we don’t always know what to do with it. But by taking a step back, trusting yourself and cultivating a certain lightness, it is possible to transform this stage of life into a rich, fulfilling period full of surprises”, puts the expert into perspective.
“Faced with this emptiness, letting yourself be surprised by what can come is great,” he specifies. In this key period, rethinking the couple and love is therefore necessary. You can plan a trip, a vacation… or simply shared activities that allow you to reconnect (sports, scuba diving, hiking, gardening…).
The main thing is to find time for yourself, reconnect with your common desires and reinvent your daily life together.
“Above all, I advise going towards what you love, to relearn how to please yourself. Allowing yourself time for well-being (…) is also a good idea. Finally, learning to look at yourself differently, to accept yourself as you are is necessary”,
concludes the specialist.
A new page is turning here… it’s up to you to redefine the major chapters!