Long idealized, the Kimye couple in reality hid a relationship of domination and guilt. Today, Kim puts into words the influence and emotional confusion she suffered. How can we understand — and get out of — such a psychological trap?
A star under the influence
If the duo Kanye West and Kim Kardashian seemed so in love – and happy (The couple said “yes” in 2014), things continued to deteriorate until their separation in 2021. Today, the mother declares that she tried forcefully to save her relationship.
“I always felt terrible, I always protected him and I always wanted to help him“, she explains.
Today, the rapper is multiplying his “slips” (sexist and anti-Semitic slips, alcoholism, harassment, etc.). The star who admitted to being “bipolar” is in a relationship with Bianca Censori, who some suspect of being completely under the influence of her companion.
Four years after her divorce from the rapper, Kim Kardashian still seems marked by this story. She admits to feeling guilty, telling herself that she should have “hold on“and declares that she has”always felt like I had a bit of Stockholm syndrome” with the American rapper.
A form of loyalty to his “executioner”
According to Amélie Boukhobza, Stockholm syndrome does not fall under any official diagnosis.
“The term is used more to describe a psychological phenomenon: when a person, caught in a relationship of domination or violence, develops an attachment – or even a form of loyalty – towards the person who mistreats them,” she admits.
This phenomenon is therefore not madness, but a survival mechanism.
“When physical escape becomes impossible, the brain adopts another strategy: adapt. Seek to appease the threat, to please, to maintain a connection – even a toxic one. A real psychological confinement then sets in. The person no longer perceives clearly what they are experiencing. They rationalize as best they can. They minimize, dissociate, become attached. And this is where confusion arises.” warns the practitioner.
Moreover, if we often associate this syndrome with situations of sequestration, confinement or captivity. In a romantic relationship, the trap closes more subtly.
“Moments of affection remain, tender memories are created, common projections take hold. We cling to them. We want to believe in them. Little by little, the measure of what is acceptable becomes blurred. All notions fade away. The other is permanently present – violent then attentive. And doubt sets in”, underlines the specialist.
Stockholm syndrome: how to get out of the grip?
To get better, you must first name it. “Acknowledge what you have experienced. Get out of the vagueness, get out of the grip. But this process takes time: you cannot free yourself from a hold by simply turning a page. The testimonies of people affected by this syndrome speak for themselves. admits the expert.
Here, the objective is therefore plural: you must rebuild your self-image, find your own point of view, accept — sometimes painfully — having been deceived, manipulated, or simply overwhelmed.
“Listening to other victims’ stories also helps. Discussing, realizing that we are not alone. And above all understanding that there is no shame in experiencing this or that feeling. Control does not reveal weakness. It simply reveals our humanity.” concludes Amélie Boukhobza.
By breaking the silence, Kim Kardashian does more than talk about herself: she reminds us that no one is safe from a toxic relationship. Strength, sometimes, begins by putting words to your pain.