Addressing the issue of mental health with a loved one is never easy. The fear of hurting him, appearing intrusive or finding the wrong words can slow down the discussion. However, according to psychologist Siyana Mincheva, the essential thing is elsewhere: it is above all a question of speaking from the heart.
“There is no such thing as an ideal word. What is important is to be heard, by expressing yourself with love and kindness“, she explains.
Listening before speaking: an essential key
Before even broaching the subject, it is crucial to adopt a respectful and empathetic attitude. The tone, the look, the posture: everything counts in this type of exchange.
“The person in front of you will sense from our attitude the intention addressed to them. This is why it is fundamental to avoid being intrusive, and to make your message heard with kindness“, recommends the psychologist.
To establish a climate of trust, you must start by truly listening to others, without judgment.
“When you have a loved one who is suffering, the wisest thing is to listen to them as best as possible, while being kind and respectful towards them”underlines Siyana Mincheva.
Encourage him to know himself better and ask for help
The discussion can also be an opportunity to recall what mental health really encompasses. Indeed, “Mental health is closely linked to knowing how to listen to yourself, to your body, and above all to know yourself”explains the specialist.
This self-knowledge comes through sincere introspection.
“Knowing how to know yourself means knowing how to listen to your needs, your limits and, above all, identify the cause of your suffering. To do this, you need to know how to ask yourself the right questions, to be in search of yourself without self-criticism or judgment.”
Siyana Mincheva also recommends encouraging your loved one to consult a professional if necessary. “Starting psychotherapy is the best advice you can give, encouraging your loved one to seek help from trusted professionals.”
However, we must remain aware that the approach cannot always come from the outside. “Each person has a different level of evolution: there are those who choose to evolve and change from within, and those who prefer to bury their heads in the sand and inflict suffering on themselves”she recalls.
Support without forgetting yourself: finding the right balance
To inspire a loved one in difficulty, Siyana Mincheva evokes the thoughts of psychoanalyst Carl Gustav Jung.
“His thoughts can help our loved ones navigate the complexities of modern life with a better understanding of self and others. He used to say: ‘I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become’. This quote encourages others to take control of their destiny and not let their past dictate their future.”
But helping someone get better shouldn’t come at the expense of yourself. “When you give attention to a loved one while trying to help them, it is essential to know how to protect yourself and maintain a balance. You have to know your limits, otherwise you will burn out.“, insists the psychologist.
Finally, it is essential to keep in mind that everyone moves at their own pace. “Awareness remains above all a personal decision. Everyone moves at their own pace, and we must accept that we cannot save others from themselves.“, she concludes.