Behind this word inspired by corporate vocabulary hides a very real practice observed on dating applications. Milestoning consists in quickly formalizing a relationship, just to “play the role” during a marriage, a family dinner or a trip. The accomplices, the hands tight in front of the loved ones give the illusion of a solid couple. But once the event is over, the curtain falls and the silence settles: place in ghosting.
Milestoning, between illusion of love and life -size test
This staging contrasts with the situations, where the commitment remains voluntarily vague. Here, everything is framed. According to Emma Hathorn, expert at Seeking“This allows you to go straight to the goal much more quickly instead of wasting time and spending countless hours to know you better“. For some, marriage or family meal then becomes a real compatibility crash test.
The format seduces by its effectiveness. No long preliminary conversations, no uncertain events: everyone knows their mission. We save time and take advantage of a partner ready to play the game, before moving on.
The emotional risks of the disposable couple
If practice seems practical, it is not without danger. Emma Hathorn warns: “Look for someone just for an event can quickly become toxic“. Behind a tacit contract, there are sometimes feelings. One of the two can get attached and believe in a serious story, when the other saw only a temporary role.
Complications also arise when the chosen partner does not properly play his score, or turns out to be bulky once the event has passed. Not to mention the risk of being perceived as manipulator or interested.
How to avoid discomfort?
For those who let themselves be tempted by this game of appearances, some rules are essential:
- Clarify from the start that the relationship is temporary;
- Avoid giving false hopes or simulating feelings;
- Be ready to assume the eyes of others if the relationship stops net after the event;
- Stay attentive to your own emotional reactions to avoid an emotional injury;
- Do not use the other as a simple social accessory.
Milestoning illustrates an era when appearance takes precedence over authenticity, when photos shared on social networks serve as a window. But behind this façade elegance, reality can be much brutal if emotions are invited into the equation.