Saturday October 11, in the small town of Sarreguemines, a child of only 9 years old probably ended her life by hanging herself from a cloth in her room. His lifeless body was found at his home. According to the prosecution, the suicide route is favored.
Mockery about her weight, the track mentioned by the mother
At this stage, the prosecution did not wish to say more, either on the circumstances of the death, or on the possible motivations of the child, who would have left “a little farewell note”. What we know is that the little girl, who was soon to be ten years old, was in CM2 class. But according to police sources, the year was not going well. According to her mother, she suffered ridicule from her classmates because of her overweight. She would also have already mentioned taking action.
For the moment, the prosecution remains cautious about the notion of harassment and says it has “no information suggesting that it would have mentioned a potential act”. The investigation is continuing, he said.
In the school, a listening cell was set up this morning, the educational community being particularly shocked.
Weight criticism: never trivialize it
Whatever the case, this tragic story should remind us of one thing: criticism about weight, increasingly early on, is destructive. According to the High Authority of Health (HAS), 17% of French children aged 6 to 17 would be overweight (BMI greater than 25) and 4% would be obese (BMI greater than 30) in 2024. In other words, four to five children per class are overweight, which does not prevent teasing, on the contrary.
“When a child is teased about their weight, the whole world inevitably collapses. At this age, body image begins to be built, especially in girls, and the words of others can become weapons“, rightly evokes Amélie Boukhobza, clinical psychologist.
So many words and evils that should not be taken lightly, even for bickering.
“The danger is to trivialize it. To respond too quickly: ‘don’t listen to them’, ‘they’re jealous’, ‘it will pass’. To ask to ignore it, basically. That’s not a solution, because the problem is that it doesn’t always work.”
Because what hurts is not only the insult, but also the shame it creates. “It’s the fear of being looked at differently, of being rejected. And even worse: the silence that settles at home, because we no longer even dare to talk about it.”
How to react if your child suffers from fatphobia?
Do you suspect discomfort and teasing regarding your child? Don’t treat this as trivial. According to the website aidodarons.com, a change in behavior can alert parents: withdrawal, loss of interest in one’s passions or school work, aggression, sleep problems, anxiety, depression, school phobia. “The appearance or strengthening of eating disorders (EDB) is also a good indicator.”
Faced with these signs, several actions are possible to best support the child:
- Listen to it. If the child confides, it’s about listening to him.”without judgment, without haste. Avoiding dramatization, but without minimizing either“, evokes our psychologist. A child who evokes a mockery, even small, often tests the security of the link. He wants to know: “Can I talk about it without you totally freaking out or minimizing it?” ;
- Name what he experiences. Putting it into words is already giving it back a little power. “We can say: ‘What you are suffering is unfair, it is violent, and you do not have to bear it. But you have to talk about it and learn to respond’” ;
- Act with the establishment. Whether proven or not, if there is suspicion of mockery or harassment, you must also act: notify the school if it goes far, meet the teachers, remind people of the limits. “A child should never be left alone in the face of peer violence” ;
- Offer him follow-up. If you see that sadness is setting in, that behavior is changing – more anger, more susceptibility, withdrawal, sleep problems – do not wait to consult a psychologist. “Psychological follow-up can help them regain their senses, protect themselves, restore their self-esteem.” ;
- Teaching him to react. As with any type of harassment, you also need to teach your child how to respond. “Not necessarily by reporting directly to the adult, nor by ignoring, nor by responding head-on. But by learning to destabilize the other. Humor, in these cases, can be a formidable weapon“, recalls the psychologist.
According to her, it is time to train our children in this, individually, but also collectively. Training them at home, by playing skits, giving them repartee and answer keys, helps to restore their courage and strength.