History quickly made the buzz on social networks. During the Coldplay concert on July 16, the Love Cam trapped a couple.
Indeed, when Chris Martin acts, the objective sets for a man and a woman. Lovers appear on the giant screen. The public heats up. But when they notice what happens to them, the two protagonists turn away, embarrassed, almost distraught.
An attitude that the group leader does not fail to point. “”Oh, look at these two“, A fun the singer before continuing, seeing them flee the camera:”Either they have an affair or they are very shy “.
The CEO of a large American company and its married HRDs … but not together
Very quickly, the videos of this moment circulate massively on social networks. Internet users are investigating. And what they discover confirms the singer’s words: the filmed man would be a senior leader in tech, married. The woman by her side is obviously not his wife. They are Andy Byron and Kristin Cabot, respectively CEO and human resources director of the Astronomer company, specializing in the development of software and whose value would be greater than a billion dollars.
A few hours later, the real companion of the man, whose social profile is scrutinized from all sides, would have withdrawn his name from wife to take up that of a young girl. In silence, it confirms the evidence. And finds herself brutally mixed with a story she has never chosen.
When infidelity becomes a spectacle: the mechanisms of public humiliation
What this Love Cam has uncovered is not only a matter of heart. It is a violent exhibition. An involuntary naked and a kind of intimate betrayal which becomes mass entertainment. “”It’s not lucky anyway“Breathe psychologist Amélie Boukhobza.”A small romantic concert… and PAF, the Love Cam spikes on them. What panic. Especially given the scale that the case has taken “.
The scene, captured by thousands of phones, has indeed turned into global humiliation. The pain of betrayal is accompanied here in a different blow: that of seeing his private life exposed without his consent, under the laughter or the harsh comments of unknown.
“”A story of adultery revealed live. And in the open! “ repeats the psychologist. “”The intimacy here becomes material in Buzz. It is no longer a secret to settle in the shadows. It is a public affair. An emotional blow, aggravated by the digital crowd that looks, comments and shares “.
How to react, for the people affected by this story?
For the deceived person, the slap is double. She cashes treason, but also her sudden media coverage. She sees her face, or that of her spouse, associated with hashtags, memes, judgments. What to do then, facing such a shock wave?
“First: protect yourself, by cutting the networks” advise our expert. “”No need to review the scene in a loop or read the comments“. Because yes, people feast on this kind of stories, but we don’t have to attend.
Then comes the time to return to oneself. The psychologist invites you to refocus on his feelings, to listen to what is happening inside. “”You have to understand that we are going through a shock, that one is legitimate to feel anger, sorrow or a form of confusion“. And what is the victim of deception or the author.
“”It is also crucial, in these moments, not to be alone. Surround yourself with trusted people, ask for help if necessary, speak, or on the contrary be silent, but still according to your own pace. Nothing is compulsory “ recalls our expert.
And above all, she recalls with force: shame has no place here, for deceived people. “”It is not to the deceived person to be shame. Not it is up to her. “
Rebuild after a brutal exposure
In the din of public humiliation, only one certainty remains: everyone has the right to react as they wish. “”Crying, leaving, staying, howling, saying nothing … None of these reactions is bad. There is no perfect method. There are only human beings, injured, often devastated, and who must regain a foothold in their own reality“Confirms Amélie Boukhobza.
Because the other trap is the gaze of others. “”What must be resolved is what is played out between the two people concerned. Their couple’s business must be settled between them, not in the public square. Because we often forget: behind these viral videos, there are real people. With real emotions. Fears, doubts, sorrows. Lives that vacillate. And decisions to make. Under the gaze of all, unfortunately “.
Infidelity is already an injury. But when the scene becomes viral, it turns into trauma. “”So we do what we can. We move away to come back little by little to ourselves. Far from looks“She concludes.