After 1,277 days of detention in Evin prison in Tehran, Cécile Kohler and Jacques Paris were finally released. A relief for the families, who are now firmly awaiting their return to French soil. But how can you return to a “normal” life after three years of detention? Amélie Boukhobza, clinical psychologist, shares some answers with us.
Cécile Kohler and Jacques Paris released: a “huge relief”
Cécile Kohler and Jacques Paris had everything to be happy… but life decided otherwise. While they wanted to travel around Iran together, the two lovers of literature and travel were locked up in the sinister Evin prison. The reason? They were reportedly sentenced to 20 and 17 years in prison for “espionage”.
Since then, their loved ones have continued to mobilize public opinion and politicians to free them. Their evacuation this Tuesday, November 4 to the French embassy, therefore puts an end to worries and sleepless nights.
“For now, the only thing we know is that they are out of prison, for us, it is a huge relief“, Cécile’s parents told AFP. “We know that they are no longer subjected to this inhuman treatment to which they were entitled, and that now they are at the embassy, so they are already in a small part of France“, they added.
However, if car horns are already heard outside their home in Alsace, new challenges await Cécile Kohler and Jacques Paris. How do you get used to a normal, mundane daily life again when you have lived in Iranian jails for so long? How to become yourself again after having been “dehumanized” and deprived of your fundamental rights? Amélie Boukhobza, clinical psychologist, guides us.
Time is necessary for the trauma to transform into a story
Being a hostage, a prisoner, is unthinkable. Coming back unscathed from such an experience is therefore impossible.
“Yet, after liberation, we expect a “return to normal life”, as if it were enough to pick up where we left off,” notes the expert.
But there can be no immediate recovery, since we are no longer quite the same. The body, first of all, keeps the traces. This involves carrying out a complete check-up: injuries, deficiencies, illnesses, etc. They must be given time to recover, particularly in the event of malnutrition. This can last for days or even weeks.
Then mental health is affected, without a doubt.
“Hypervigilance, insomnia, startles, nightmares, invasive images: all the classic symptoms of post-traumatic stress”, underlines the psychologist.
And as Hélène Romano, a psychotherapist specializing in victims, told us in another article: “What happens next will largely depend on the conditions of detention, which we now know are appalling (confinement, rape, threats, mistreatment, etc.). But the more time passes, the more it becomes clear that this complicates reconstruction, both physically and psychologically.”.
Then, the discrepancy is real: everything seems both too noisy and too empty. Loved ones want to understand, relieved to finally find the one they love. “But often, the words don’t come. Or badly,” specifies Amélie Boukhobza, clinical psychologist.
Because the experience of trauma confines: it isolates, renders mute and confronts us with the horror of reality. It is not so much a refusal to speak on the part of the newly freed hostages, but rather an impossibility to tell. They have escaped any form of logic… and a certain amount of time must pass for the trauma to transform into a story.
“So, most often, we remain silent. Or we speak differently: through the body, through silence, through gestures.” recognizes the practitioner.
The attitude of loved ones is important
When the ex-hostage returns, he can go from joy to sadness, from anger to despair. For loved ones, obviously, this new facet is confusing. How do you reconnect with someone who no longer speaks… or no longer speaks like before?
“It takes a lot of patience. Do not rush the person and especially do not demand a story. Silence is part of reconstruction: it protects, it organizes, it digests“, specifies the specialist.
Little by little, over time, the pieces come back together. They do not return to their initial form, but are arranged differently, with a new lucidity. We are finally rewriting history here,”which constitutes the very foundation of psychotraumatic work”, assures the expert.
Because after having experienced absolute fear (Cécile Kohler notably recounted the physical and moral torture she had endured over the last three years), something in oneself is transformed forever.
“You have to relearn everything, readjust everything. Relearn to trust, to laugh, to go out, to be with others. And normality, contrary to what you might think, is not a step backwards. It is simply being able to feel alive, again”, concludes Amélie Boukhobza.