The end of love does not always rhyme with the end of a marriage. Behind this resistance to divorce hide powerful brakes: children, family ties, dependence – financial or emotional – and sometimes fear. Poppy and Geoff Spencer Relationships advisers, interviewed by the media Your tangorecall that each situation deserves to be analyzed with honesty.
You stay for children
In many homes, parents choose to maintain their union only “for children“. Some go so far as to promise their sons or daughters to never divorce, believing that they are protecting them. However, specialists advise against making such promises and recommend favoring an honest dialogue, adapted to the age of children.
Your families have strong links with your spouse
Family ties often complicate rupture. When parents and in-laws have solid relations with the spouse, it becomes difficult to break. Poppy and Geoff Spencer recall: “Although it is important to have the support of your parents, try to see your own interest in the situation“. And add:”Do not stay in an unhappy wedding because it makes other people happy“.
You are dependent on your spouse
Beyond the weight of the family, money is a major obstacle. Many women, who stayed at home to take care of children, find themselves financially dependent on their spouse. An dependence that can become emotional, until you lose all autonomy. Specialists alert: “As you go, you abandon total control of your identity to your spouse. Self -giving is so subtle, that your mind can be slowly sucking in the void of your spouse“. Result : “You end up doing everything according to your will“.
You are afraid to leave your wedding
For other couples, it is fear that prevents the plunge from taking the plunge. Threats around child care, financial instability, psychological pressures … so many elements that enclose in a toxic relationship. Experts advise: “If this is your case, you must seek the help of a healthcare professional who can help you cope“.
The recommendation is clear: “You have to get out of this spiral of fear and look for alternative solutions. In any case, this type of behavior on the part of your spouse should not be tolerated“.