According to a recent study by the Mariage.net website, more than half of the French couples expect to receive less than € 100 per person during their marriage. However, the majority of guests plan to give between € 100 and 150 €. A surprising discrepancy, which invites you to think: what really really pay to satisfy the bride and groom? Amélie Boukhobza, clinical psychologist, helps us see more clearly.
Money is preferred to physical gifts
With the return of sunny days, the wedding season is in full swing. Everyone is on the bridge to organize: future spouses like guests. But a question, often left in silence, trotted in many minds: what amount to slide in the envelope?
Before determining the exact sum, let’s analyze the expectations and needs of couples. According to the wedding.net website, which collected the opinion of 1,300 people, 54 % of newlyweds think that this money “should reimburse at least part of the wedding expenses.”
Sum which must take the form of a transfer or a check, since traditional gifts such as vases, silverware or embroidered laundry have now passed in fashion. “6 out of 10 couples already have a child and therefore share accommodation equipped before even getting married”, said the press release.
Therefore, 91 % prefer to receive a sum of money that they can use according to their own needs and priorities. “This sum is generally received in the form of a transfer (33 %), check (33 %) or in cash (34 %).”
How do you know what is the right amount to offer as a guest?
Traditionally in France, the sum offered covers the cost of the meal by guest at least. Here are two tips for determining the ideal amount:
- Knowing the average cost spent by guest: the average cost of a marriage in France amounts to € 19,921, according to a recent report. The reception has 97 guests. The cost spent per guest then amounts to € 205.37.
- Know the average cost of the menu: it is possible to search for the place where marriage will take place on sites such as Mariage.net. The minimum prices per menu are then indicated in the online windows of places or caterers.
Money and marriage: the opinion of our expert psychologist
Faced with this thorny question, Amélie Boukhobza plays the card … of sincerity.
“”It’s not (just) a story of money. Perhaps it is rather necessary to think about the place. The one we occupy in the life of the bride and groom. The one we think we should honor. And the one that we sometimes fear to disappoint“She says.
Indeed, several cases are to be differentiated. “There are loved ones who give a lot” because it is the family “. Those who give more” because they can “. Those who calculate according to the price of the meal. And those who give less, but who made 700 km, posed two days off, and bought a dress that they will never put back. All this counts “, she continues.
The essential, ultimately? “”The gesture must be sincere. Up to everyone’s possibilities … not dictated by the fear of doing wrong or looking bad. Because what really matters is not the amount. This is the link. And what we want to offer, in his own way. “