Who has never smiled when he saw himself on his screen “My Rabbit”, “Baby” or “Laurence” at the time of a call? Behind this little detail of everyday life is actually hiding a mine of information on love dynamics. Psychologists and observers confirm this: the way we record the name of our partner in our phone speaks volumes about our way of loving, our degree of attachment or our need to keep track of the beginnings of the relationship.
Affectionate nicknames and their symbolism
Many opt for a tender little name, which may seem cute but testifies to a strong attachment. As Amélie Boukhobza, clinical psychologist: “points out:”When you choose a tender, almost intimate nickname, it is often that we try to maintain the flame of the beginning“. For the expert, this habit translates an intentional gesture:”This reflects the desire to keep this emotional, visible emotional bond as a discreet obviousness in everyday life“. In other cases, the choice is made on a private joke or a nod to the meeting, strengthening the complicity and intimate mythology of the couple.
When sobriety or the absence of a first name sets
Conversely, some prefer simplicity: first name alone, initials or mention “husband” and “wife”. A sobriety which, according to Amélie Flame Boukhobza, can reflect a particular posture: “A more pragmatic name – first name alone, initials, or a functional detail – can translate another posture: a form of distance, a need to have the other in its place, or simply a simpler, more obvious, less nourished relationship by idealization“.
With the boom in online meetings, another trend has appeared: that of keeping a simple landmark, like “Tinder 3”. The Independent explains: “Many do not even record the first name, by superstition or for fear of attaching to prematurely“. A precaution that reflects a form of protection:”Not to name is not to hope, not to have to erase if things go wrong“.
Here are the different categories of nicknames that are most often found:
- Funny nicknames or linked to a private joke;
- Tender and romantic nicknames;
- Sober and pragmatic choices;
- The absence of a first name or a simple digital landmark.
This little name that crosses the years
It often happens that the first nickname chosen remains frozen for a long time, like a time capsule at the start of the relationship. The psychologist explains this: “Often this first choice remains frozen over the years. Because basically, changing this little piece of digital memory would amount to touching something deeper: the trace of the very beginning, from the moment when we wanted to give a special place to this meeting“. Even after several years, he continues to exist as a silent witness.”We evolve, the relationship changes, but this little name remains. A silent witness of the story that we wanted to write …“.