Likes, stories, comments: these virtual interactions give the impression of existing … but impoverish our real relationships. Here is why this emotional solitude becomes a silent evil of our time – and how to get out of it.
The illusion of the link and a certain connection
“We combine likes as points of life … But in the end, it’s often the void that wins”sums up Christian Richomme, psychoanalyst.
The figures speak for themselves: 82 % of French people feel a feeling of loneliness, including 62 % of 18-24 year olds-an age group, however hyperactive on the networks. This paradox is explained by the very nature of these platforms: they offer a simulacrum of link. We are seen there, commented … but rarely really encountered.
Hyperconnected, emotionally isolated
“”Social networks connect us without attaching ourselves “observes the psychoanalyst. In other words, they multiply exchanges, but impoverish relationships. Recognition becomes digital, cold, impersonal. She no longer goes through the voice, the gaze or the presence, but through a rapid and disembodied reaction. And this lack of human warmth can become toxic: “We are looking for validation, we post to be seen, we wait to be loved … But we stay alone behind our screen ” restores the expert.
This logic creates a vicious circle: the more you feel alone, the more you publish. The more we publish, the more we depend on the gaze of others to exist.
Invisible damage to the all-in-numeric
Little by little, this deficit of authentic link has very real consequences on mental health:
- Self -esteemfueled by constant comparison with the idealized lives of others;
- Emotional isolationbecause digital exchanges do not replace gestures or looks;
- Emotional dependence on virtual feedbackwhich prevents listening to his real needs;
- Difficulty creating deep linksbecause the habit of the digital filter inhibits the real meeting.
“We talk, but through a screen. We” like ‘, but we don’t touch each other “, underlines Christian Richomme.
How to get out of this emotional trap?
But what to do to find a human, human, in your daily life. Without advocating a radical disconnection, the author offers some keys to find a healthier relationship with networks … and others:
- Reduce digital noise : sort your subscriptions, favor nourishing content;
- Wonder before posting : Is it a sincere sharing or a call for masked help?
- Come back to the embodied exchanges : a coffee, a walk, a real moment;
- Tame the void : Do not flee boredom, but inhabit it, because this is where real links can be reborn.
Reconnect to yourself, the condition to better connect to others
His observation is clear: social networks are neither good nor bad in themselves. These are tools, powerful, but unable to replace the human link. For Christian Richomme, it is a social issue: “Reconnect to others begins by reconnecting to yourself. “
Faced with the emotional loneliness that even eats away at the best connected wires, it is urgent to put true in our relationships. To prefer looks to likes. The shared silences with repeated stories. And, above all, to relearn to exist without showing yourself. There is an emergency.